Caught Orange Handed

After a night of much drunkeness, friend 'X' crashes with a drinking pal 'Y' (subject of another blog down the road), at another friend's 'Z' house. (Note: I am not part of this night of drunkeness--I'm an old boring guy who stayed in that night.)
X and Y end up making out and having 'happy fun times' that night EVEN THOUGH a 'pillow barrier' had been erected by X between them to keep both X and Y honest & pure. (Note: the pillow barrier's effectiveness has not proven well with either X or Y.)

I go to pick X up for church the next morning. Later, walking to brunch, I notice that his hand is VERY orange--disturbingly orange--like a rash gone REALLY bad.

Me: What's wrong with your hand?
X: I made out with Y last night when we crashed at Z's.
Me: The pillow barrier didn't work again?
X: Yup.

Me: So what did you do to your hand?
X: I borrowed some lotion from the nightstand and didn't read it well.
Me: Self-tanning lotion?
X: Yup.

A friend couple is going to brunch with us.
As we're walking to brunch, Kevin looks over at X's hands.

Kevin: It looks like you made love to a cheeto.
X: I know, it's bad, isn't it?

I'm kind of glad I stayed in that night and went to church the next day.
I wonder if Y will panic when he sees his cheeto?
I wonder what Z will do with those sheets?

1 comment:

Fancy Pants said...

Oh boy. Yeh, pillow barriers aren't always effective.

Btw, sorry bout the politics thing, geez, I feel like I tried to school ya or something. Please ignore it, I was bored at work and that leads to terrible things!